02.16.15

Lana Del Rey- On Our Way

"It is okay to be at a place of struggle. Struggle is just another word for growth. Even the most evolved beings find themselves in a place of struggle now and then. In fact, struggle is a sure sign to them that they are expanding; it is their indication of real and important progress. The only one who doesn't struggle is the one who doesn't grow. So if you are struggling right now, see it as a terrific sign- and celebrate your struggle" - Neale Donald Walsh.

I struggled for a long time. I had the worst starting of the year, and I really didn't think that I could feel any better after everything that happened to me. It is funny how quickly things could change. I went from being happy, to being completely broken, to being more than completely happy again. The smallest things can make the biggest change in your life.

I told myself, I was no longer going to sit on my ass and feel sorry for myself, so I did just that. I went out with friends, I met new people, & I made new experiences. I am creating a new life, and a new way of looking at things. No doubt, what happened has made me look at things in a darker light, just because I fear of being hurt again, but I think it is better this way. I will not just jump into anything like I used to do. I want to show someone myself completely, & I want to learn about others completely, before I even think about starting again. I never thought I could feel so comfortable with being alone. No one to worry about making happy, not having to worry about being lied to, or hurt. Just concentrating on myself, and pursuing my dreams. It is funny to think that I always wanted someone to be there with me, and help me grow, when in reality I only needed myself.

I have come to learn that sometimes, you just need to put the past away, and move on with your life. I was so hung up on the past, and why everything ended the way it did. I hated myself, thinking it was all my fault.  I always thought I had to better myself in order to make things work. I prolonged my past more than I should have, more than any person would. It really is true when they say, "everything happens for a reason". I used to roll my eyes at sayings like this, along with, "when one door closes, another one opens". I didn't believe in these things because I thought what I had was forever. Now I laugh at that thought, and 100% believe that things end in your life, so better things can begin... and finally, everything is falling into place for me.

Always appreciate those who love you, help those who need you, forgive those who hurt you & forget those who leave you.